February Critique, wherein monsters and magic reign

Two pieces were presented for review this week, both part of ongoing W’sIP. [I like that – wees in pee!]

The first critique focussed on the presentation of the power moments of the scene/s and the character in action and the placement of things and people – you guessed it: the whole gamut of how to get the right feel in the right place at the right time. And clearing up the repetitions.

The second critique focussed on trying to find the reaction to the [where did they go?] character actions. And the repetitions. And the placement of power moments and the placement of people and things – oh, hey! You guessed it: first/second drafts that need to focus on the purpose and progression.

But it was fun and a great learning process.

And in the middle of the discussion, one of our members (the one with the broken wrist and the great story about subterranean beasties that lift the pavement in heaves of discomfort (see the real thing at the museum – yes, they’re real! Diprotodons[?]!) when they try to scratch that itch) had to get the help of the trauma nurse who noticed how we couldn’t help get the funny-looking not-quite-cotton thing – oh, a sling! –  around her neck and arm to hold it in place with a small measure of comfort. Thanks, Danielle, it was wonderful to see the character Adelaide come forth again.

Which started another conversation. ‘Don’t judge a book by it’s cover.’  No, Danielle didn’t look funny – it was the issue of how people in Adelaide are really helpful and how much they go out of their way to offer assistance.

And the conversation moved onto the people we’d met, or heard about, who were not what you would expect an angel to look like, but were nevertheless, angels who helped people in trouble. It’s people who can’t be judged by the covers, not the books, because if a book can’t be judged by its cover, how is the reader going to figure out what it’s about?

The words of  the story introduce the reader to the broad sweeps of the story, just like a painting. They get a view into the world of the story. They see a picture. Or they should. And the cover is part of that introduction to story; it should allow itself to be judged by the way the writer dresses it for presentation to the world. When it comes to people, the saying (adage) may ring true, but for the book and story, it is the opposite – it will always be judged by the first few flickers of the picture that is generated.

Yes, I’m still talking about story with words. Story creates a world for the reader to become part of, to live in, to breathe and sing and dance – it’s real, and it only becomes real when the word-pictures are deep, compelling; when the reader is drawn into the spell (your) story creates for them.

Anyway, next meeting is all about people: Character, how things change, how the person grows and learns though the things they suffer (what we put them through, but it’s alright – we don’t feel a thing). See you then.

A New Year – A Bigger Dream

January, and we’re all here – the whole lot of us! From poet to pastry chef, from dancer to singer to high-flier to cat-whisperer. Okay, enough of that! What did we do? What did we discuss? Where are we going for this new (and better) year?

Discussed:

• Radio plays (PBA-FM 89.7) and who’d like to do one for the host
• Chuck Wendig, Agatha Christie, Terry Pratchett (know what they have in common?)
• the word tailor within our group, and the new site
• the new collaborator (Rose, of the tawny eyes)
• the Anthology (yes, yes, yes – it will be good, better, the greatest) of Speculative Fiction Stories from Hell to High Victorian and everything in between
• the list of things to discuss and learn and use in our work as professional writers – the toolbox, now updated
• And (tah dah)
• Goals for 2017

What are some of those goals? To write more, of course, but the big one is to learn enough to be able to share that knowledge with someone else. People who teach understand this: the teacher learns as they show others how to learn. This is what we want for each member of the group – learn and relearn when showing others what was learned. It works – try it! The only time to truly understand the level of [craft] knowledge is when it’s put down in a plan to show others how to incorporate what the teacher knows and uses into how the student can use and learn and incorporate into their own knowledge base, their own skill-set. That’s what we want!

Oh, and to write more – or did I already say that? Doesn’t matter – repeat the goal enough times that it becomes a mantra, and repeat the mantra enough times that it becomes a life meaning (and meaningful).

As this was the first meeting for the new (and better) year, the post is short, and it’s no reflection on the amount of time we spent discussing issues and items and responsibilities, but next post will be full of bones, full of sustenance and fibre; it will be solid and . . . [there I go, off on the fairy-trail again – so goodbye from her, and goodbye from him – see you next time!].

September Critiques

Things are happening. Three short stories, destined for our upcoming anthology, were critiqued this month. Prepare yourselves for dragons, gadgets and a dalliance with the Fae.

We discussed description, show/not tell, the origins of words and symbolism. Altering one word can change the meaning of a paragraph, or clarify the intent of a scene.

The quote for the day:
“Other languages borrow words. English lures people down a dark alley, knocks them on the head and goes through their pockets looking for loose grammar.” (unknown meme).

 

August Meetup

The discussion this month was Spec Fic Chic’s upcoming anthology. Things are happening.  We now have a name, a design for the cover and a growing list of stories to showcase our members’ work, including science fiction, fantasy, steampunk and suspense.

This month’s critique featured a delightful time-slipping fantasy short story, for possible inclusion in our upcoming anthology. Discussions centred on description, symbolism and word choices.

August meet-up was not at the library, due to my convalescence and no-drive status for a few more weeks. We should be returning to the library by the end of September.

 

May Critique – An indrawn gasp, a long drift down, and the pound of hearts

Yes – that’s how it is! Get the right feel – for a lazy moment, the sentences should reflect the ‘feel’ of that moment; where the character is in a moment of fight, flight, or freeze – show it through their actions, reactions and events. Setting is part of that event; rhythm of sentences reflect the POV passage through that scene.

Long, lazy, slow sentences are at risk of putting a reader to sleep; sentences that follow the same structure line after line are worse – the reader will never get a feel for the words. Music has rhythm, words have movement and music and light and smell and interactions (action-reaction; cause-effect), and story has ebb and flow and metaphors that don’t get cross or lazy or expositional.

Today, we discussed a lot of pieces:

A short story that was trying to impart a moment of departure from this world. To ensure interest, intersperse deep internalisation with action and events; make something happen.

Short – the fear of the dark, and how to best present how the character finds the moment of redemption/change through the response to normal, everyday moments of joy.

Short – when crossing the line between ‘them’ and ‘us’  and how to ensure there is a line, and the line is clear and distinct, but the story defines the pieces where what really happens, what was really there, is real. It is real, isn’t it? The thing in there? Excellent touches of humour and denouement.

Short – wolves and moons and when the changes happen and don’t; who can see the clues? Good suspense, good thrill.

Viola – rapid paced scene of intrigue.

Stair – where and why and how to instil a fear of the inevitable. What is the moral? And how does she fear the consequences of her actions?

We discussed a lot of things (always do), and even with different genre writing, styles and voices that vary from post-modern to pre-medieval, and the diversity of starting and ending points – we learned a lot. About our own work, about how we use the work of other people to improve our own work, how to push ourselves to produce better work each time, and how to help (push) our other members to do the same – all of us.

Life is short, story is life, put them together to impart a little journey through life into each and every story, each and every character, and each and every theme.

We are all story, and we want you to read ours. Bon appetite!

The Blue Moon Critique with Elements of Foresight

A full basket of stories:

1. Update on Ms Hem and her antics (steam punk)
2. Men go mad under the influence of manipulation (steam punk)
3. Movement across the desert in search of water – and dragons
4. What’s down there? Held over ‘til the next critique
5. Companions we don’t really care for – also held over.

 

The first discussion was Ms Hem. The story is in fragments of plan, outline, scene/s sequences, and research requirements. A lot of discussion on what level of research is required, specifically for steam punk readers. Detail of certain things is expected, however, other things can be glossed over, particularly if they are a lead in to something that comes later, or have been mentioned before, or are not relevant to story.

Discussion on requirements of scene and POV: when to break a scene, how to prepare for scene change, segue (flow), and cause and effect. It may be good to leave a reader hanging for a moment to build the suspense, to magnify the conflict, but the opening and closing of those little moments are very important.

The second discussion is a follow-on from the previous submission in a steam punk novella (a jolly good show, chaps!). The main discussion revolved around (yes, revolved is the appropriate word) how to use a word to imply a feeling – and the use of metaphors that follow the flow of the story, and stay within the bounds of the metaphorical confines (don’ mix ya metaphoricals, laddy). The story unfolds in a manner that hints at the right things in the right places, causes the reader to check over their shoulder (just in case), and to look askance at people they thought they knew (well, story-wise).

The third discussion tried to get more of a feel of the distinction between internalisation and dialogue – how would a person speak in their own mind about their situation, and whether they would waste breath on someone who is giving them the . . . willies. How many characters need to be active in a scene to bring to scene to life? How many characters does the main char have to interact with in order to give the full impact of the scene? How much of the setting needs to be overlaid onto the main character’s (or should that be through) senses (sight, sound, smell, touch, taste – and emotions).

 

We also discussed printed book requirements – what looks good, what doesn’t; cover requirements, text elements, page colours, fonts. It’s a minefield, and that doesn’t include how to ensure the formatting the writer puts forward doesn’t get changed by the auto-formatters!

Short stories – several shorts were discussed and a plan laid out for critique of the ones at the stage of completion (awaiting final critique or final proofread). Short stories can be more difficult because the same requirements of story are held within fewer words, within a tighter structure, but must still lay out a full engagement.

And because this meeting was extraordinary (the blue moon), we’ll be back again next week, to discuss Structure (what is it, and how do we make it work best for this story?).

 

April Critique – and Mad Moments in Marketing

Several items came up for this meeting – diversity of the nature only a writer would understand:

1. Fragments of story and how they fit together to make an outline; preparing the conflict and how it flows; why characters do what they do; and why they want the things that encapsulate the story conflict.
2. A short story that had already gone into publication prior to the meeting (NDE No. 2).
3. Ongoing story of steam-punk characters, gadgets, and nefarious plots.
4. Author bio – need to get back to that one, but it is a necessary item in the bag-of-tricks, just like the press package, or marketing package, in case things like:

Photographer arrived exactly on time, prodded everyone into various locations and situations, snapped and snapped and snapped until he was happy with his loot (got snapped in the process – and liked it!).

Leader Messenger News – story on SpecFicChic – should be out in the next couple of weeks.

The critique issues:

POV character responding to the things around them: the concept of cause and effect. If the POV character doesn’t respond overtly, the reader expects something internal. POV is powerful, and internalisation (in the right place and time) can be the tool of power to show distinctiveness, distress, duress – or on the opposite spectrum, it can demonstrate arrogance, ignorance, distance from the issues. Sometimes we think the writer has last say, but it is the character – who else would behave this way in this situation but the person in it? That’s the point we need to reach – let the character show us exactly how the moment works through their senses, through their thoughts and actions and most important of all – through their words.

And next year, we’ll be putting dialogue back on the toolbox list – it is a necessary item to not only learn, but to keep learning, to keep in mind for each and every thing we write where we expect people to speak (dialogue and internal thoughts, as well as internalisation – which isn’t thoughts, it’s the POV character) – anyway, it’s a tough assignment, and it will be back.

***

A special thing this month – five Friday’s – a blue moon month.

To celebrate, we will be having a second critique Friday on 29 April.

March 2016 Critique

This seems to be the time of year when people are busier than usual, when things unexpected and dramatic (and horrible) can happen. Be on guard – be prepared to protect your soul, your loved ones, yourself. From the Ides of March to the end of March – gird your loins (does anyone know what that really means? I can imagine holding both hands in front of my privates and giving the Marilyn Monroe face of shock (I love that scene).).

It sounds silly, but it’s true. From about a fortnight before the equinoxes, there are ripples in the lives of most people. Why? Are there dark forces that are able to get closer to their targets at this time? I sure don’t know, but I have noticed. Has anyone else noticed? Is the writing at this time of year more shadowed, more dense, darker, more terrifying?

The stories (from WIP’s) critiqued this week both centred on shadows and darkness, fear and loss. To enable the reader to feel that context in the way we (the writer) want them to, we need to ensure the story is deep in character, told as if the reader is wholly involved and connected to the character. We understand, because that’s what we wanted when we were the readers, isn’t it?

Is that what readers still want? I do.

We were a bit short this week, one person protecting an ill friend, one protecting herself from illness, and another off to seek employment in these tough times. A person could write a story about these things, couldn’t they? The drama of survival of body, mind and soul in a heartless, fast and relentless world of pursuit (do we ever catch what we pursue?).

We also discussed the hellish road of e-publishing, e-marketing, the issues surrounding getting our anthology ‘out there’ and the genre that would be appropriate – so many things to consider. This is the ‘business’ side of writing. The ‘job’ is to create the product (good enough to inspire someone to look at it more than once) and the business is getting that product out to the people who will or would or want to make use of it, buy it, enjoy it.

As a writer, I hate the business side of the job, but it’s necessary. Traditional publishers are not the route for most writers any more – they can pick and choose and keep a stable list of horses (whoops! writers). For the rest of us, no matter how good we are (or think we are), we need to understand the business side and allocate enough time to enable our product to support the prospect of going back to the job we love.

When our books come out, please enjoy, please comment/offer review. We need you, the reader, to be the other half of our journey in this world of story. And we want to know what you think.

Feb Critique – Full House

This week we had three submissions (all WIP). The common themes for the critiques:

Let the character be alive and doing things – just a description of what happened is not very interesting to a reader: Live, live, live!! through the eyes, heart, nose, mouth (dialogue), mind of the POV character.

Cause and effect – the character doesn’t fall until after the gun is fired; they don’t hear the doorbell until it is rung; his voice isn’t described until after it has said something. This is an area where all the group have improved, and it gets harder to find these moments, but if you find yourself at a point in the story where you stop and have to think about what just happened, you probably found somewhere it has happened – even if it is subtle.

Take advantage of the moments in the story that expand the character through their actions, through their words, through their thoughts and feelings (and ACTIONS – was that said before?). The story isn’t about the character, it is the character living the story in their own words, in their own world, through their own feelings, judgements, actions (etc., etc., etc.).

Comma use – some people put them in where they’re not needed, some people don’t use enough. Reading the work aloud, or having someone else read it aloud to you, may help (see that last sentence – if you take out the words between the commas, the sentence still makes sense).

Length of sentences, pace, and character actions – long sentences slow the reader down, slow the pace. Short, sharp sentences increase the pace (sometimes the tension), measured sentences of one metronomic moment represent something similar to a piece of music – and music has a beat, a movement, a feel. If the beat is of the character breathing fast, use the sentence to reflect that beat, that rhythm.

Exposition, telling, does not make a story interesting. It becomes interesting when the character walks, talks, sings, yells, punches, pulls, swears, DOES something to instil in the reader the same information as the exposition.

It all sounds so easy! The biggest issue (probably for most writers) is that we write what is in our head, and we see the whole picture. When we put the words on paper and someone else reads them, they have to make their picture from only the words. Become the reader and read only what is written, visualise the world through the words, and if something is missing or lacking (depth, purpose, etc.), recreate the words to truly reflect the world you want to share.

ALSO, Two members had work published in the Tea Tree Gully Fringe Festival Event: A Trail of Tales:  http://atrailoftales.com/ an event staged by Tea Tree Gully Council (see page for full details).

Look for the Houghton Howler.

January Critique

Today we discussed the projects and toolbox elements for 2016 (isn’t it amazing, another year has just flown by!).  See our Writing Themes Page for the update.

One piece of a WIP was presented for critique – part of an ongoing serialised Steam Punk story. The main things we considered was when a tease is too subtle, when a word is okay, but not quite right, when a paragraph or sentence needs to be shortened/lengthened to give the right feel, the right atmosphere – and the way the words present the picture (if you want the reader to see a big gate, some sort of description of the size is appropriate – a tiny bit of tell, maybe, but the reader has to get just the right picture).

The second piece was a backpage blurb – and it needs some work. A blurb is a tease, not a synopsis. Maybe one day we should include a toolbox item for synopsis, blurb, etc.

We will also be considering a series of short stories for competitions throughout the year, and the good ones (that means all of them) will go into our anthology.

Keep watching! And enjoy the year of the Monkey.