May Critique – An indrawn gasp, a long drift down, and the pound of hearts

Yes – that’s how it is! Get the right feel – for a lazy moment, the sentences should reflect the ‘feel’ of that moment; where the character is in a moment of fight, flight, or freeze – show it through their actions, reactions and events. Setting is part of that event; rhythm of sentences reflect the POV passage through that scene.

Long, lazy, slow sentences are at risk of putting a reader to sleep; sentences that follow the same structure line after line are worse – the reader will never get a feel for the words. Music has rhythm, words have movement and music and light and smell and interactions (action-reaction; cause-effect), and story has ebb and flow and metaphors that don’t get cross or lazy or expositional.

Today, we discussed a lot of pieces:

A short story that was trying to impart a moment of departure from this world. To ensure interest, intersperse deep internalisation with action and events; make something happen.

Short – the fear of the dark, and how to best present how the character finds the moment of redemption/change through the response to normal, everyday moments of joy.

Short – when crossing the line between ‘them’ and ‘us’  and how to ensure there is a line, and the line is clear and distinct, but the story defines the pieces where what really happens, what was really there, is real. It is real, isn’t it? The thing in there? Excellent touches of humour and denouement.

Short – wolves and moons and when the changes happen and don’t; who can see the clues? Good suspense, good thrill.

Viola – rapid paced scene of intrigue.

Stair – where and why and how to instil a fear of the inevitable. What is the moral? And how does she fear the consequences of her actions?

We discussed a lot of things (always do), and even with different genre writing, styles and voices that vary from post-modern to pre-medieval, and the diversity of starting and ending points – we learned a lot. About our own work, about how we use the work of other people to improve our own work, how to push ourselves to produce better work each time, and how to help (push) our other members to do the same – all of us.

Life is short, story is life, put them together to impart a little journey through life into each and every story, each and every character, and each and every theme.

We are all story, and we want you to read ours. Bon appetite!

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